just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
In sex ed. they really need to include a lesson on saying tampon in foreign languages, just in case.... Trying to ask the woman at the reception desk, who barely speaks English, for one just turned into an awkward game of charades.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
I need a beard to bite.
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