yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize
