What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Sorry I just took 4 pills about 20 minutes ago so I'm feeling like a claw machine like people tell me were I need to go and what to do and I'm just like yes sir so I get the teddy bear but I set it on fire and it's kinda black on one side and there might be smoke coming off it.
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I woke up to him "wax on, wax off"-ing my boobs. I just reminded myself that I love him and let it happen.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
You dropped my mother on the dance floor. She has a concussion. You didn't apologize. Don't speak to me for a while.
I may have unintentionally punched your cat twice but he's an asshole anyway.
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He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
Sorry i ignored you for so long. I think my vibrator is broken.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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