question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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