did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
I wish Denzel Washington would coach my flip cup team..
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Here you are just trying to masturbate and I'm talking to you like your an initiate for some secret society.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Just woke up to Siri reminding me that i need to kill the giant orange spider in my room, because it's sorcery and witchcraft is sacrilegious. Did you give me LSD again!?!??!
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
