Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize
