No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
Everything about him screamed your future.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
Blowing a married man is so much more important than a 12 year olds basketball game.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
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