just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
Just got a lecture from Dad about how I need to be more responsible and start buying my weed in larger quantities so that i can save money. Like he was serious and kind of disappointed in me for not adapting to his method earlier.
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
Either he was jacking off or having a seizure next to me in bed. Either way, I was too lazy to help.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
