Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
The only thing I'm asking santa for is my period.
And vodka?
And vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
Randomize