spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
Randomize
