they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
A "Tom-vomit" is when you puke but cough as it comes up, so you close you mouth as a natural reaction and the vomit is jet-propelled out your noise.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
Randomize
