I wish there were whore gnomes that cleaned our apartment when we were gone.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
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