Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
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