It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
Like real life can suck my metaphorical dick right now.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
Randomize
