like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
Something tells me tonight will end with me wearing my pants on my head again.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
