so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
This is three metal detector wands away from being the strangest porn I have ever been in the audience for.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
