I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Seriously, even though I keep it clean, I could douse it in bleach and set it on fire and still not be comfortable with you actually holding it. It's been in my VAGINA.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
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