Tell her she can't have a vagina
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Randomize
