the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Of course I have a pirate flag
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Its like the floor is slow but life is fast?
I see you found the nyquil...
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize
