Well apparently he's into motor boating.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
After I'd been making out with her for a good 15 minutes some guy yelled "grab this chicks beer she needs both hands!" And he was right I did need both: god bless jello wrestling.
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
Bring vodka when you get back from court.
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