I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Bjs and tacos. That's my life.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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