Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
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he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize