you guys are cousins why the FUCK are your pants off
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
Woke up naked with a post-it that said "don't ask questions" on my ass...i know im not supposed to ask but uhm what did I do?
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
Randomize