if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
my dealer just handed me my weed in a pink easter egg
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Randomize
