Her vagina should come with caution tape.
You said I was the most beatiful preggers youve ever seen...im not pregnant
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
this poor kid thinks hes going to have his first time with both of us
Randomize
