i have accomplished my summer goal of being able to relate to every taylor swift song
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
How does one tell their boyfriend they're pregnant with someone else's kid??
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize