I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
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