Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I never thought I could be this turned on by a man wearing racoon tails.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
