How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize
