You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
the first call I got in the morning was from visa fraud prevention so yeah it was one of those nights
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
You're like a human soul vacuum cleaner.
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
Hypothetically, I throw a party and my ex-boyfriend and my current fuck buddy are in the same house... what should I do?
How many beds are in the house? Hypothetically...
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