at 4 in the morning i heated a family sized mac n cheese for a minute and decided to eat it frozen cuz I didn't wanna wait for that long
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I just found a hunk of ham in my back jeans pocket from god knows when. We gotta stop going so ham.
You stumbled in at 10am, half-clothed and still drunk from last night and yelled "well, its not called a walk of pride!", then passed out on the couch.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
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