My first STD was from a foam party
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
He was all “please don’t bail because I’m missing work for this” last night
Honey no, I need dick. I’m not going to bail
Randomize