I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
I buy a new bowl every time I get a new guy. It's retail therapy.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
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