Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
just found a beer in my hamper. even my laundry is a dirty alcoholic.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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