Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
GET OVER HERE. HOTTIE ALERT
^^^This is why you should have charged your phone prior to going out.
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
I think I'm dead. Also I think I stole $20 from a stripper.
You did. Then gave it to me.
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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