Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
You can trust me. I'm unemployed and not wearing pants.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
