ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
You drunkenly said something along the lines of "move forever" to the lady standing in your way. Needless to say you had too many mimosas at breakfast.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
Randomize
