yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
where's my purse there's an important taco in it
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
