His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I don't think brook has ever known best
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
I told him I just left the convent and really wanted a man. He fell for it. Sure beats telling him I'm a nympho stalker that followed him to the bar when I saw his beard.
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
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