There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
...so how do you feel about living with a lesbian next year?
hhaha i just laughed out loud when i read that
is that a "i laughed because im fine with it" or "im a republican" ?
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Only time i ever look at my online banking statement is to see when i left the bar.
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Considering that your "hello" was replaced with "Fuck yo couch," I'm not surprised that you have a black eye.
IT WAS JUST SO LITTLE AND AWKWARDLY FLOPPING BACK AND FORTH
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
