so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
how do i word it so it doesnt sound like im asking him if he has ever been in jail.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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