i like that octo mom she is my favorite xmen
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
I think we need to teach you what straight means again
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
Randomize
