At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
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