Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
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she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
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Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
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