im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
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