your room smells of hookers.
And success
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize