dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
That's why she's the girl with her life together and you're the girl with the penis drawn on your car.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
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The really sad thing is that I actually practiced crawling in my room yesterday in preparation for today
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
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