Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Randomize
