Your girlfriend is a south jersey whore
i don't like sucking hair
She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
my being single is dangerous.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
