I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
If I die I have 2 requests one a viking funeral prye and 2 I want you to take over my facebook and haunt the fuck out of everyone
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
If you bring home Chipotle tonight I'll give you an epic bj...ball play and all #datenight
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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