sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
How in the hell did I take a shot of whiskey to the eyeball last night?
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
Can I trade you chipotle for a pregnancy test?
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize
